Everything is Changing

It’s time to make a change.

I've been reflecting a lot over the past few days on the concept of change. My life seems to be in constant flux—what I do for a living, who I spend my time with, and where I live. These are the major pillars of our lives.

Recently, I witnessed someone go through a devastating change, something similar to what I experienced a few years ago that propelled me on my journey. Not all change feels positive when it happens, especially when we encounter what we perceive as a "negative" event. These moments often arise when our lives require dramatic shifts that we weren't willing to initiate ourselves—lessons we need to learn or a significant transformation of how our lives used to be, prompting us to shift timelines.

Ultimately, the more we resist change, the more we resist what we are meant to do in this lifetime. Whether big or small, the only constant in life is change. Time is always moving forward; the days flow into one another, and the seasons continually shift. We are meant to change just as much as life changes around us.

Have you ever noticed that when you feel stuck or unhappy, it’s often because nothing is changing in your life? To break free from a rut—whether emotional, mental, physical, or spiritual—change is always necessary.

The less we embrace change, the more we get stuck, leading to unhappiness that can bleed into other areas of our lives.

I hope you take a moment to recognize that everything in your life should be changing and evolving. We are constantly in a state of growth, and our relationships should evolve too. Sometimes, the people, places, or things around us grow alongside us; other times, they drift away. That’s the beauty of life—we are always in a state of flow and change.

Especially as we find ourselves at a pivotal moment of societal change, it’s time for us, both collectively and individually, to lean into whatever needs to shift in our lives. Embrace the refresh. Lean into the uncertainty of the unknown. It’s what your soul came here for.

The Paradox of Doing

Have you ever noticed that the harder you try to do something, the longer it takes to achieve? 

Lately, I’ve been bringing a lot of awareness into the energetic difference between doing and achieving.

We often believe that in order to achieve something, we need to do, push, or hustle to get the desired outcome. 

The reality is, the more you feel you need to try hard to achieve something, the more you reinforce that belief. This perpetually creates the energy of having to push a boulder up a hill to achieve your desired outcome.

I would like to flip that narrative on its head and say the less you operate in the energy of doing, the more you can actually achieve.

The Loop of Trying

Take falling asleep as an example. The more you “try” super hard to fall asleep, you often stay in the energy of “trying” instead of actually falling asleep which keeps you further away from your desired outcome of actually sleeping. As opposed to when we release the effort around “trying” to fall asleep and simply surrender we then can usually fall asleep.

The more we try to do something, the less we actually achieve what we are trying to do.

This past year, I kept saying I was trying to travel less. Yet, ironically, I ended up traveling more. This is because I was in the energy of “trying” to receive the desired outcome of “less travel”, which kept me in the energy of trying and led to me achieve the opposite of “more travel”.

This is because the universe mirrors back to us the energy that we are in. The more we “try” for something, the more we stay in the energy of “trying”, which pushes us further away from what we desire and thus not succeeding in our desired outcome. 

The paradox is so real. 

The Universe Reflects Your Beliefs

When we believe we need to try super hard to achieve something, the universe reinforces this belief system by mirroring back to us the energy we are currently in.

The more you believe you need to try hard, the more the universe shows to you that you do need to try hard.

Versus the more you believe in ease and flow of achieving, the more the universe reflects back to you the ease and flow to achieving.

The more you “try” to make the relationship work or try to find your life partner, the more you are in the energy of “trying” instead of receiving or achieving.

The Power of Surrender

Here’s the secret: the less you try, the more to achieve. I’m not talking about zero effort. I’m saying that it is time to release yourself from the belief that you have to try super hard to make something happen.

Have you ever noticed that when you stop trying, things just seem to happen naturally? That’s because you’ve entered the energy of surrender.

Our human mind is conditioned to believe that lots of effort equals achievement but the reality is that is simply a belief. If you believe it’s true then it is. If you don’t believe it’s true, then it’s not. You see? 

Your belief system coupled with the art of surrender will actually get you closer to your desired outcome than “trying” to achieve it.

The more you surrender, the more you achieve and receive. 

Now isn’t that a beautiful belief system.

Break the Cycle

If trying for a desired outcome will only keep you in the energy of trying and creating frustration in the process which pushes you further away from the energy of receiving.

How can you switch this or what I would call reverse uno this scenario?

Step out of the cycle of trying and into the flow of achievement.

The recipe is simple.

Intention set. Take inspired action - without expectation. Then SURRENDER.

Follow what brings you joy. Pursue the things that light you up. Operate from a space of ease, and the universe will reward you with little “carrots” along the way - showing you are on the right path ultimately guiding you to achieve whatever it is that you desire.

By releasing the need to force outcomes, you create more space for ease and what you truly want to flow into your life will come easily and effortlessly.

And so it is.

Does your darkness define you?

Someone very wise once said to me, “I’m not afraid of darkness because I understand it”.

Darkness can be our greatest teacher. It is often through heavy moments in life or periods of darkness that we define ourselves.

Have you ever let a challenging or heartbreaking moment of pain, grief, or loss rule every emotion and ounce of your being? Have you spent weeks, months, or even years stuck in that same emotion?

This is what I call letting moments of darkness define you. In moments of intense emotional upheaval, it is pivotal to know how to process and release those feelings. If we don’t, we tend to hold onto those feelings and sometimes for a lifetime. This usually happens because the emotions tied to that event are the last shreds of evidence that we have to keep that experience or person in our life.

So if you find yourself clinging to those emotions, could it be that there is a part of you that is still clinging onto the emotional experience of that person or situation? Those very emotions is what is keeping the memory of that experience or person alive in your present.

It is time for a reality check.

The longer we hold on to the heavy emotions of the past, the more we let those emotions define us. The longer this continues, the more likely we are to become addicted to those emotions. The longer we are addicted to those emotions, the more they come to define every aspect of our existence and how we show up in the world.

You can’t fully move into the bright future that you are worthy of until you release whatever darkness is lurking in the depths of your being.

It is in this pivotal moment in time that I invite you to take a step into the unknown and do the work to start to release those emotions.

This is your sign to start to release whatever darkness or heavy emotions that you are addicted to. Those emotions are not you and they do not define you. So it’s time to stop letting them define you.

The first step to any pivotal change is bringing awareness in and I hope to have shed some light into your darkness today.

Remember the depth of darkness you are able to experience is equal to the level of light you are capable of.

It is time to let the light in.

If you are looking for support and specific ways to release old emotional patterns and ways of being, book a 1:1 session and I would love to support you wherever you find yourself on your journey.

Learning How to Surrender

The biggest lesson that I am learning right now is how to surrender.

This is WAY easier said than done. I actually don’t know anyone that truly knows how to surrender. Let alone have actually mastered the art of surrendering.

How many times do we try to force outcomes because we have a self-created timeline in our head? 

We live in a world that is so immediate. We want everything instantly. Money, love, success, the job, the promotion, a certain career, or even fame. 

When we don’t receive our desire instantly or we don’t receive it on the timeline that we want, we face disappointment. Didn’t get the person you wanted in love or didn’t get the job or career you wanted? Internal sadness creeps in.

Whatever it may be, it can be so challenging not to focus on the disappointment around not receiving what you long for.

The reality is, the second we shift the focus from longing (which stems from lack) to surrender, is when we make space for what we are looking and what is truly meant for us to arrive.

In order to surrender we have to release the attachment to the outcome.

How do you do this?

Truly surrendering comes down to having complete trust and faith in something unknown and greater than ourselves, as if we are simply falling into the divine plan of what we’re supposed to be doing. The art of surrendering is having complete trust and faith in the universe. That everything is lining up for you and that something even better is on its way and in its own time.

Sometimes learning to surrender can feel so challenging because the ego is learning one of it’s hardest lessons, how to stop controlling the whole universe. 

So how can you stop trying to control every aspect of your life and start to practice the art of surrender?