Toxic Relationships Make You Ugly

We’ve all seen it—a person completely drained by a relationship. Maybe it was you, someone you knew, or someone you passed on the street.

Just by looking at them, you can tell. The light within them is gone, leaving only a shell of the person they once were. The dark circles under their eyes, the drained expression, the glazed-over look—all of it screams "toxic relationship."

Our relationships truly make or break us. Especially for women, relationships can either be a safe and supportive space—when a healthy masculine presence creates a structure for emotional support and safety—or they can drain your divine feminine energy with every interaction, playing emotional games, creating turmoil, and ultimately sucking every ounce of your life force energy.

We don't always choose who we love, but we can decide if that love is healthy for us and decide to leave.

You can often tell by looking at someone’s face whether they are thriving or merely surviving, and relationships play a significant role in this.

There is the classic saying that “it’s important to be mindful of the three closest people in your life because their energy affects you”. If they are a mess, your life can become a mess too. Energy is contagious.

The longer you allow someone to drain your life force energy by engaging with them (which, by the way, is the biggest universal sign they are NOT for you), the more it actually affects every essence of your being.

Stress over long periods causes premature aging and a myriad of health issues.

Your choice in a partner is one of the biggest life decisions you can make and the biggest indicator of your self-worth.

Every woman knows when she’s being energetically depleted by her relationships, and it shows up physically.

Conversely, a woman’s energy radiates differently when she’s being healthily loved.

The difference is visible, and it’s a reflection of the love you accept and it’s written all over your face.

Does your darkness define you?

Someone very wise once said to me, “I’m not afraid of darkness because I understand it”.

Darkness can be our greatest teacher. It is often through heavy moments in life or periods of darkness that we define ourselves.

Have you ever let a challenging or heartbreaking moment of pain, grief, or loss rule every emotion and ounce of your being? Have you spent weeks, months, or even years stuck in that same emotion?

This is what I call letting moments of darkness define you. In moments of intense emotional upheaval, it is pivotal to know how to process and release those feelings. If we don’t, we tend to hold onto those feelings and sometimes for a lifetime. This usually happens because the emotions tied to that event are the last shreds of evidence that we have to keep that experience or person in our life.

So if you find yourself clinging to those emotions, could it be that there is a part of you that is still clinging onto the emotional experience of that person or situation? Those very emotions is what is keeping the memory of that experience or person alive in your present.

It is time for a reality check.

The longer we hold on to the heavy emotions of the past, the more we let those emotions define us. The longer this continues, the more likely we are to become addicted to those emotions. The longer we are addicted to those emotions, the more they come to define every aspect of our existence and how we show up in the world.

You can’t fully move into the bright future that you are worthy of until you release whatever darkness is lurking in the depths of your being.

It is in this pivotal moment in time that I invite you to take a step into the unknown and do the work to start to release those emotions.

This is your sign to start to release whatever darkness or heavy emotions that you are addicted to. Those emotions are not you and they do not define you. So it’s time to stop letting them define you.

The first step to any pivotal change is bringing awareness in and I hope to have shed some light into your darkness today.

Remember the depth of darkness you are able to experience is equal to the level of light you are capable of.

It is time to let the light in.

If you are looking for support and specific ways to release old emotional patterns and ways of being, book a 1:1 session and I would love to support you wherever you find yourself on your journey.